Online poker is fun and all. The only problem is that you miss out on the camaraderie of playing at a table full of people. You also miss out on the ability to bluff, read someone’s poker face, and talk trash. Also, quite obviously, you miss out on the opportunity to travel.

Well, for some lucky players, Titan Poker is going to help you experience all of that. The online poker room is holding a tournament that will send lucky winners to a live poker tournament in Dublin, Ireland. Which tournament? It’s called the Irish Open. Maybe you’ve heard of it.

The Titan Poker Irish Open takes place in March and until then Titan Poker is holding satellite tournaments 24-hours per day. As you advance through the satellite tournaments, you get closer to the grand prize, which is not only getting a trip to Dublin on the casino, but you also get a free EUR 300 buy-in, EUR 3200 gambling money, free accommodations for five nights in the swanky Burlington Hotel and some other goodies as well, including EUR 800 of spending money.

If that sounds good to you, there’s never been a better time to grab a Guinness, put on a Damien Rice album (or U2 if you would rather), and get your poker on! You’re probably thinking, Well, sure, they pay for everything if you win, but the tournament is probably expensive to join. If that’s what you were thinking, then you thought wrong. If you are new to the site, simply enter the Titan Poker Bonus Code TP600 during your registration. Doing so will give you a $600 signup bonus as well as a free $25 to play with in the poker satellite.

So basically, what it comes down to is this: If you like poker, there is no extra risk to this tournament beyond playing poker using real money any other time. And if you win, you have a shot at an all-expenses paid trip to Dublin to take part in the Irish Open. And if you win and don’t want to go, let me know. I will gladly go on your behalf!

So a priest walks into a poker tournament and wins $100,000. That’s not a joke, but when you first started reading the sentence you probably thought it was going to be. If it was, though, I probably would have started it with, “A priest and a rabbi…”

This, however, is no joke. A South Carolina priest, Reverend Andrew Trapp, recently entered the PokerStars.net Million Dollar Challenge and took a shot at the $1 million prize. His church, St. Michael Catholic Church, is trying to raise $5.5 million to build a new church and is nearing that goal. Trapp, who is an assistant pastor, received permission from his pastor and also from the Charleston bishop.

Since it was a free tournament, Trapp contends that he wasn’t really gambling. He also stressed that in his view, activities such as gambling and drinking aren’t sinful if they are done in moderation. The key is to be smart and not overdo it (which is pretty much my opinion as well). “It’s a question of moderation, just like anything else,” Trapp said. “We believe it’s fine to enjoy a beer or a glass of wine, but not to abuse it and get drunk.”

Trapp had a lot of fun at the tournament and likely challenged the preconceived notions some of the other players had about priests. “At the very least, even if I didn’t win any prize money, I was hoping it would help people to see that priests can have fun and be normal people and hopefully get a little bit of a fun twist on the image of the priesthood,” Trapp said.

The tournament, believe it or not, was televised on FOX after the football games. Yeah, I know. I didn’t see it, either. I imagine some of the players thought it was unfair competing against a priest. After all, there’s a good chance that God was on his side. Is it cheating if God performs a miracle and gives you the winning hand? I guess not. In any case, Trapp didn’t win the grand prize, but he did bring back $100,000 for the church, which is now a little less than $1 million short of their goal.

If there’s one thing the government knows how to do, it’s take money from others. Two different government agencies saw fit to fine the Palms Resort Casino and the casino had to pay a total of $100,000 in a settlement. And what did the casino do to get these fines? Well, nothing, except allow two tournaments to take place on their premises.

The Palms Resort Casino paid a $75,000 fine to the Nevada Gaming Commission and a $25,000 fine to the Nevada Gaming Control Board. This all came about after the state’s attorney general’s office received complains about two poker tournaments in 2007 that were held by third parties at the resort. According to the Las Vegas Review-Journal, the tournaments did not register with the state’s gambling regulators prior to the events. The Palms Resort, by virtue of allowing the tournaments to take place on their property, is responsible for them, according to the NGC and NGCB.

Both tournaments came under fire for unpaid prizes. The United States Poker League hosted a tournament called the Poker Bowl. It was a team-based event that featured several famous professional poker players. After the tournament, however, the league found itself out of money and needed to sell off their assets. The tournament winners were never paid. The Palms, in a show of goodwill, stepped in and paid the $450,416 in prize money to the deserving players out of their own pocket, even though they were not the ones responsible for giving out the prizes. That, of course, wasn’t good enough for the government, who had to go to the trouble of investigating the claim. Therefore, they fined the Palms Resort Casino anyway.

The other complaint is about a tournament organized by Michael Eakman and Associates. The tournament was organized to benefit the Jewish Community Center of Southern Nevada. The tournament winnings did eventually get paid to the Community Center, but it took four months to do so. Again, this delay was caused by Michael Eakman and Associates, not the Palms Resort.

The Palms Resort Casino, despite being unfairly targeted by government bullies, did not fight the fines and paid them immediately upon notification. It was a big win for fans of bullying, greedy government agencies everywhere.

If you’re like me, you never remember dates and tend to make plans at the last minute because if you make plans earlier, you will just forget anyway. That could be why I’m not married (women expect you to remember their anniversary). It could also explain why I always buy cards from the “belated birthday” section at Hallmark. So if you are like me – and I hope you’re not because one of me is already too much for most people – then you might want to mark this down on your calendar… Okay, first you might want to buy a calendar. Then you should mark this down:

On November 23, Titan Poker is holding their fifth European Championship of Online Poker (ECOOP V). The tournament will have a guaranteed prize pool of $4,550,000. In case all of those zeros confused you, the number is $4.55 million. Not too shabby. The online poker tournament will be held over 14 days and begins on November 23.

You, the lonely procrastinator who angered his girlfriend by not remembering when you met, are probably thinking, It’s October. Why in the world is he telling me about this now? That’s because I want to help you with your problem. Plan in advance. It’s better for everyone. Also, you can’t wait until November 23 for this tournament. To win a seat at the digital table you need to play in the qualifying satellite tournaments that are going on every day.

There are a number of different online poker varieties available in the satellite tournaments, including Texas Hold’em, Pot Limit Omaha, and 7 Card Stud, among others. Over the 14 days of the Championship tournament, $4.55 million in prizes will be distributed among the top players. On December 6 is the Main Event, where the remaining players compete for a $1.5 prize pool.

To participate in the online poker satellite tournaments, visit Titan Poker today. If not today, please write it down so you don’t forget. Write it on a Post-it, a napkin or something. If you don’t and you forget, you can’t blame me for not trying to help.

Titan Poker is getting some pretty good press right now. Not only are they getting some good name recognition thanks to Joanna Krupa, but they’re offering good promotions as well. Krupa is best known for her modeling career, which includes posing for Playboy, and is also pretty well known for appearing in various reality TV shows, such as Dancing with the Stars, in which she is currently competing, and that one show where a bunch of celebrities and athletes competed in athletic competitions. Does anyone remember that show? Krupa is also somewhat known for being a spokesmodel for Titan Poker, a former televised poker tournament host, and a decent poker player herself. But mostly it’s the modeling thing. In any case, with Playboy lobbying their readers, few of whom probably watch Dancing with the Stars, to vote for her, Krupa has a chance to win the competition. If so, it’s only a matter of time before someone says, “Hey, isn’t she the spokesmodel for Titan Poker?”

On the tournament front, since this isn’t Modeling Review or Reality Television Review, Titan Poker is hosting the $1,500 Cash & Monthly Million Qualifier Freeroll tomorrow, October 8. The tournament is open to any Titan Poker members who deposit at least $20 and have a minimum of 10 Titan Poker Points. The winner of the qualifier is automatically entered in the Monthly Million Tournament, which takes place on October 11. For that winner, the entry fee is waived, which is $500 of savings. Aside from that, $1,000 will be distributed among the top finishers in the qualifier.

So, whether you enjoy watching hot, poker-playing models dancing or playing poker online for a shot at a big prize pool, right now is a good time to pay attention to Titan Poker. To participate in the freeroll qualifier, visit Titan Poker.

October is a special time of year. Summer is gone and it starts to get a little chilly (in Florida sometimes dropping way down to the 60’s). Baseball’s postseason starts. We raise awareness for breast cancer, spinal bifida, and lupus. We celebrate Filipino American History Month and Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender (LGBT) History Month. Roxy Palace Casino also unveils now promotions. Alright, that last one is not a known national observance for the month of October, but is it less obscure than LGBT History Month?

This month there are several promotions going on at Roxy Palace. From October 6 to October 12, the online casino is holding the Roxy Poker Challenge. It is a video poker tournament with a unique twist. Instead of giving prizes to the top earners or top wagerers, this tournament rewards those with the highest winning percentages. That percentage is calculated by the proportion of hands won to hands played. In this way, the tournament rewards smart and skilled players. I know what you’re thinking: No, you can’t simply win the first hand, quit and then win the tournament. In order to qualify, the player must deposit at least $100 and wager a minimum of $2,500 during the promotion.

Running from October 6 to October 8 is the Bonus Slots Magic tournament. This tournament takes place on a variety of online slots. For this promotion, players are rewarded for wagering the most. Those wager the most in the tournament will share a $4,000 prize pool. Players need to deposit a minimum of $100 to qualify for the tournament.

There are also a variety of online slots and table games for which Roxy Palace is giving out double Player Club Points, including Scoop the Cash, Lumber Cats, and Adventure Palace. In addition, yesterday Roxy Palace premiered several new Microgaming titles, including Pure Platinum, Kung Fu Monkey (a favorite of one Gambling Review writer), and Wooly World.

To take place in the tournaments, head on down and visit the nice folks at Roxy Palace. Tell them I sent you. Actually, they won’t care, so don’t bother.

Who says there is no good television in Canada? It has been reported that HeadsUp Entertainment International will launch an internet television poker network this year on Canadian television. Yes, that’s right. There will be a channel dedicated to televising online poker tournaments, casino poker tournaments, and documentaries about – you guessed it – poker tournaments. In related news, Canadian citizens have identified a new channel that they will never watch. It will be kind of like MSNBC in America. The channel exists, though no one knows why.

My esteemed colleague Ricky Bauer has written extensively on the terribleness of poker on television and he’s right. Poker is an activity where the players, in order to be good, have to show a complete lack of emotion, so televising it would be like watching Keanu Reeves in The Day the Earth Stood Still. I’ll be honest here. I would rather watch a cooking show on Food Network than watch poker, because at least that way I can pick out a few recipes to try, ruin, and then complain that it looked so much better on TV. Also, after years of watching Dan Aykroyd on Saturday Night Live, I have been conditioned to expect at any moment for the host to slice his or her finger and start spraying blood everywhere. If poker carried the risk of injury, maybe it would be more interesting, but I think the biggest risk is getting a paper cut from the cards.

Someone disagrees with me, though. Kelly Kellner, president of HeadsUp, says that “players and fans will have a means to pursue their interest in the sport and we couldn’t be more excited.” Couldn’t be more excited? Quick, somebody introduce Kellner to exciting things! There are so many things you need to learn about, from sporting events to concerts to roller coasters to secret trysts in the Gambling Review break room during lunch break. Mr. Kellner, you need to get out of your office and experience life outside of poker!

Maybe the network will be a success, but I doubt it. I’m going to give Canadians the benefit of the doubt and believe that, despite their love of hockey, socialized medicine, and ice fishing, deep down the Canucks actually have good taste. After all, they did bring us Jim Carrey. Therefore, I’m predicting that soon I will be writing another article on the subject, which may be titled “Cadadian TV Poker Network Fails Miserably, as Expected.”

Next month, Titan poker will give their players a chance to win a cut of one million dollars. The first in a new online poker tournament series is set for launch starting next month on September 13. The online poker tournament guarantees prizes totaling one million dollars with a buy-in of $535.

Times being what they are, you might be hanging your head in disappointment, believing there is no way that you can scrape that kind of cash together. Well hope is not lost. Titan Poker is offering less affluent online poker players the opportunity to win a seat in the online tournament via qualifier satellites featuring buy-ins as low as $1.10!

In June, the main event of its European Championship of Online Poker IV series (which might be the longest and worst title ever for a tournament series) Titanpoker.com held a $1.5 million tournament while continuing its Sunday evening tournaments with guaranteed prizes of $250,000.

Titan Poker is the biggest online poker room in the iPoker network and so they tend to do things a little bigger than your average online poker site. Players are already said to be signing up and there is a cap of 6,000 players so this could be a pretty sweet tournament.

Barack Obama is a polarizing figure to say the least. When he showed up on the scene seemingly out of nowhere, he became all the rage. This despite the fact that he only beat Blair Hull in the Illinois Senate Democratic Primary by having David Axelrod get Hull’s divorce records unsealed and then using that information to spread a lie that he hit his ex-wife, and the fact that he only won the Senate because Republican Jack Ryan withdrew from the race after, you guessed it, his divorce records were unsealed and the lie was spread that he tried to have sex with his own wife at a nightclub (Yes, folks, that was the scandal that destroyed Ryan’s career). Despite all of that, when Obama announced his candidacy for president, the media, college students and professors, and other people who listen to the media and college professors believed that he can walk on water. If Obama is The Chosen One, surely he would be a great poker player, right?

If there is one thing Obama has it is charisma. His public persona is that of a cool, confident leader, in spite of his weak grasp of politics and economics. His cool demeanor would serve him well at a poker table. Obama is also used to convincingly lying to the people, which would serve him well when bluffing. On the downside, Obama is not nearly as convincing or charismatic when he doesn’t have a teleprompter and planted questions, so he would be wise to pick a strategy ahead of time and stick to it. No going off script.

As Ricky pointed out in his Sarah Palin article, having a good nickname is important for poker players. President Obama has gone by a few different names. Back when he was hanging out with communists and drug dealers, he went by Barry. Some people call him by his middle name, Hussein, but his supporters are always quick to call those people racists for trying to make him sound like a Muslim, as if Barack and Obama are names as American as apple pie. Other names that he goes by, though unofficially, are The Messiah and The Anti-Christ, depending on who you talk to.

Good poker players are great at math, and with the way the national debt is rising and the amount of money being spent, Obama should certainly be good with numbers. A good poker player is also secretive, which certainly applies to Obama, who blocked virtually every document about his personal and professional life from being released to the public. Good poker players are also very disciplined, and I can only commend Obama’s restraint for never strangling Joe Biden after any of his attacks of verbal diarrhea. Good poker players have to be accepting of the fact that sometimes they will lose, and I’m not sure how Obama would handle that, because he doesn’t have a whole lot of experience with adversity. Hopefully, his opponents won’t get too annoyed at him gloating “I won” every time he scoops the chips toward him.

Most of the above skills seem to be in his favor, but the number one reason Barack Obama would be good at poker is because he is very good at taking other people’s money.