In a landmark legal decision, Florida’s gambling regulatory board has deemed that slots with themes of table games are still indeed slots. Despite the games being played in tribal casinos in the state, the Florida Division of Pari-Mutuel Wagering had previously upheld a ban on all slot machines themed after blackjack, keno, roulette and more. Casinos that wanted to run slots with those themes challenged the decision and, surprisingly, reached an agreement with the regulator that would allow the games.

After careful inspection of the slot machines in question, the regulators discovered that a blackjack-themed slot machine is not the same as actually playing blackjack. No, seriously. It was only after careful inspection that the regulator came to that conclusion. In a statement, the regulator said that “the machine is not a viable alternative to the traditional game of blackjack nor does it offer the same gaming option to a skillful blackjack player.” Most people could probably determine that the game would likely play kind of like a slot machine without ever inspecting it, but common sense isn’t really big in government. Likewise, an inspection of the other slot machines themed after table games resulted in the same conclusion: they’re still slots and thus, permitted in the casinos.

Up until this decision, the regulator’s thinking was basically this: A Superman-themed slot is a slot, a NASCAR-themed slot is a slot, a baseball-themed slot is a slot, a Robocop-themed slot is a slot, a monkey-themed slot is a slot, an Egyptian-themed slot is a slot, but a blackjack-themed slot is no slot machine. It is blackjack.  After a thorough investigation, however, the Division of Pari-Mutuel Wagering realized their error.

In related news, the regulator decided not to prosecute people who play Street Fighter slots on the basis that by playing the game they were committing assault. They also decided that you don’t need a passport to play a Caribbean-themed slot and there is no need to join the MLBPA to play a baseball-themed slot. It turns out that playing a slot machine that shows baseball players on a video screen isn’t the same as actually playing baseball.

Okay, I made up that last paragraph. Sadly, though, I felt a need to tell you that I was joking, since it’s not much more ridiculous than the truth.

Tags: blackjack slots, Division of Pari-Mutuel Wagering, Florida gambling, keno slots, roulatte slots, slot machines

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