A lot of people hate the French, but I don’t. To me, they’re just too silly to hate. I mean, look at that outrageously snooty accent (and don’t tell me Pepe le Pew doesn’t crack you up), their ridiculous idea of how to ruin pancakes, their women with unshaved pitts, and of course their willingness to surrender to anyone who gives them a tough time. Indeed, hating the French is like hating the handicapped or that cousin of yours who just doesn’t seem quite right. It’s not their fault they are French; they were born that way.

Therefore, I didn’t really think much of it when I heard about one of the amendments proposed by the French government in their new gambling legislation that will take effect next year. It’s just the French government being silly again. After all, they do all kinds of silly things, such as not allowing free speech. In this case, the amendment states that once the new gambling laws take effect, all online casinos with French customers must cancel the accounts of those customers and ask them to re-register.

Yes, you read that correctly. The reason is the same as most instances where big government decides to make a decision for someone else: to make it more “fair.” You see, with the new gambling laws in France, more companies will want to start operating in France. It’s unfair to them that other online casinos already have French customers. Therefore, the casinos must drop their existing French customers and ask them to re-register, though they will not be allowed to offer any incentive to register once again with the same company. That would make them susceptible to other casinos swooping in and registering them instead. Gee, do you think lobbyists had anything to do with this amendment? Hmm…

This would be like if I opened a new gym in town and told Bally’s, LA Fitness, and all the other existing gyms that they had to get rid of all of their customers because it’s unfair that they have them and I don’t. Then, since Bally’s can’t offer them a special deal to re-sign with them, I convince them to join my gym instead. Yeah, that sounds fair to me!

Some have speculated that the amendment may be used to protect French monopolies Francaise des Jeux and Pari Mutuel Urbain, who were excited by the EU ruling that monopolies are allowed if the government deems it in the public’s best interest. Big government attacking private enterprise for its own benefit? Who saw that one coming?

* Since I wrote so many bad things about the French, let me say something good to balance it out: France, thank you for Sophie Marceau.

Something wicked this way comes… On December 1^st, the United States must come in full compliance with the regulations set forth in the Unlawful Internet Gambling Enforcement Act or UIGEA for short. Meanwhile, the Poker Players Alliance (PPA) is scrambling behind the scenes to slow the coming storm of vague laws aimed at bureaucratizing the illegality of online gambling.

The patron saint of online gambling (or is he?) Barney Frank introduced HR 2266 which would delay the effects of the UIGEA by one year. This would in theory give lawmakers enough time to consider a better way to tax and regulate online gambling. Unfortunately, despite garnering much support from 48 cosponsors to the bill, there are apparently “other issues” going on with the government and the economy that are somehow “more important” than the delay of the UIGEA. So it doesn’t look like help will arrive in time.

John Pappas, executive director of the PPA spoke to Poker News Daily and had this to say, “The reality is that our country is facing a lot of challenges. From a poker player’s perspective, the UIGEA may be the top priority, but it’s not the top priority of Congress. Until Barney Frank can solve the issues facing his Committee, ours is not going to take precedence.”

The PPA is apparently pursuing all avenues in search of a delay to the harmful anti-online gambling legislation. One of the considered weapons in their arsenal is the Administrative Procedure Act “allows for individuals and organizations like the PPA to weigh in with the Department of the Treasury and ask for a delay of a proposed rule.”

Also working in favor of online gambling supporters is the amount of money the government stands to gain by taxing and regulating online gambling. However, this same issue may work against them. The Obama administration and Democratic Congress have so many issues on the table like health care reform and thinking of ways to distract the American people from understanding the financial implications of passing government controlled health care that passage of anything seems like a tall order at this time.

“We are working with Barney Frank and others for a non-legislative solution to clarifying or delaying the UIGEA regulations. Given everything on the Chairman’s plate, one thing off of it is a good thing. We’re hoping to see a delay.”

October is a special time of year. Summer is gone and it starts to get a little chilly (in Florida sometimes dropping way down to the 60’s). Baseball’s postseason starts. We raise awareness for breast cancer, spinal bifida, and lupus. We celebrate Filipino American History Month and Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender (LGBT) History Month. Roxy Palace Casino also unveils now promotions. Alright, that last one is not a known national observance for the month of October, but is it less obscure than LGBT History Month?

This month there are several promotions going on at Roxy Palace. From October 6 to October 12, the online casino is holding the Roxy Poker Challenge. It is a video poker tournament with a unique twist. Instead of giving prizes to the top earners or top wagerers, this tournament rewards those with the highest winning percentages. That percentage is calculated by the proportion of hands won to hands played. In this way, the tournament rewards smart and skilled players. I know what you’re thinking: No, you can’t simply win the first hand, quit and then win the tournament. In order to qualify, the player must deposit at least $100 and wager a minimum of $2,500 during the promotion.

Running from October 6 to October 8 is the Bonus Slots Magic tournament. This tournament takes place on a variety of online slots. For this promotion, players are rewarded for wagering the most. Those wager the most in the tournament will share a $4,000 prize pool. Players need to deposit a minimum of $100 to qualify for the tournament.

There are also a variety of online slots and table games for which Roxy Palace is giving out double Player Club Points, including Scoop the Cash, Lumber Cats, and Adventure Palace. In addition, yesterday Roxy Palace premiered several new Microgaming titles, including Pure Platinum, Kung Fu Monkey (a favorite of one Gambling Review writer), and Wooly World.

To take place in the tournaments, head on down and visit the nice folks at Roxy Palace. Tell them I sent you. Actually, they won’t care, so don’t bother.

The Task Force on College Gambling Policies, an industry funded organization targeting problem gambling on University and college campuses is sharpening its focus on gambling addiction as a health concern. Surely gambling may not be as common a problem on college campuses as substance abuse and addiction, but when it occurs it is similarly tragic. Isn’t it refreshing to see a group that isn’t funded by our seized tax dollars doing something like this? Truly, a breath of fresh air.

Christine Reilly, executive director of the Institute for Research on Gambling Disorders insists the goal of her task force is, “to bring together people in higher education to help us figure out how to curb underage and pathological gambling among college students.”

The task force has cited several studies indicating that somewhere between 3 and 11 percent of American college students have serious gambling problems. For example, my gambling problem was which girl to buy beer. The right choice could mean a night of debauchery while the wrong could mean I’m footing the bill for some better looking frat boy’s screwfest. All kidding aside, the college campus is one ripe for opportunity when it comes to problem gambling. When mixing mom and dad’s credit card with high speed internet access to online casinos, there is no doubt the chance for these students to make the wrong decisions. These decisions can lead to academic, financial and even mental health issues.

The task force is asking universities and colleges to establish committees and create gambling policies in hopes of raising awareness and recognizing problems where they lie. “It is important, we believe, for schools to send a clear, unified message about acceptable behaviors,” Reilly said, “It’s very common for schools to have different rules for alcohol use… and for gambling, and so we think this is an issue that colleges should think about.”

“If a student presents himself to a university health service with a physical problem such as kidney disease or a fractured hip, the college will bend over backward to assist the student,” Reilly continues, “Addiction is a different category.”

Addiction and excess is certainly one of the most intimidating demons college students must encounter during their years of study. While colleges and universities do their best to regulate what students can and can’t access online, the technology often moves faster than they can. Online gambling laws do not necessarily prevent college students from logging on and doubling down. For years colleges have tried to block file sharing sites that violate copyright laws and yet pirated movies and music continue to flourish on college campuses.

Regardless of the challenge, colleges are being receptive to the task force’s message. George S. Mclellan, vice chancellor for student affairs at Indiana University-Purdue University Fort Wayne agrees that “all the recommendations are spot on.” He goes on to say that “If the college takes lottery money to fund scholarships, if it takes gaming money to support scholarships, if it allows the licensing of its logo on a poker table…then there’s a gap between what we say and what we do and students will head through that in an eye-blink.”

Moscow officials are concerned that a recent ban on gambling in Russia has led to a rise in online gambling. In fact, as hundreds of legitimate casinos have been closed down, many internet cafes have sprung up. Worry not, though. The authorities are doing their best to stamp that out, by raiding illegal casinos, internet cafes and other establishments that cater to those who believe in doing what they want with their own money.

Roughly a third of the casinos once in existence currently stand in Russia, and those now only sell lottery tickets, except for the few that are getting raided and shut down. Is that trampling on freedom? Well, historically speaking, that’s not exactly a Russian concern. They would be concerned, of course, if the government found they are missing out on a lot of money. However, Moscow Deputy Mayor Sergei Baidakov, who I like to call Ungle Serg, stated that the ban on gambling has only caused tax revenues to drop by 0.5%. “It’s nil compared to the benefits to the health of the nation.”

Right, their concern is for the health of the nation! I keep overlooking that. Maybe it’s because their Prime Minister is an ex-KGB agent, they have a history of starving their own people, murdering political dissenters (or putting them in the gulags), silencing debate, conquering other countries, and denying their people basic civil liberties. Hey, Russia, if you are concerned for the health of the nation, here’s something you should give a try: freedom.

Yeah, I know. Believe it or not, people enjoy having it. Maybe that’s why, despite your beautiful white winters and charming hospitality, you get considerably fewer immigrants than, say, America for example.

But of course Moscow isn’t really concerned for the health of the nation, at least not in any rational way. But that is the problem with a big government like they have in Russia. Big government does not see people as individuals, but as a mass of resources to fuel said government. Sure, individuals want to be able to criticize Vladimir Putin without being blacklisted. Sure, individuals would like to vote in an election that has not been carefully engineered by the government. Sure, individuals would like to protest without disappearing off the face of the earth. Sure, individual laborers would like to be treated better than indentured servants. Sure, individuals would like to be able to spend their own money on a game in a casino without being imprisoned. But when you look at society as a whole, does it really matter what those individuals want? Whether they’re happy or not, they will pay their taxes and do their work (both out of fear of imprisonment), so their health, their happiness, is of no concern to Moscow.

Marking the first time South Carolina has been ahead of the curve on just about anything, a South Carolina court recently ruled that poker is a game of skill and therefore in the eyes of the law should not be painted with the same brush as other gambling activities like slot machines or roulette. The Poker Players association, who counts almost 10,000 of its members South Carolina residents, marked a solid victory in the eyes of the PPA and poker players all over the nation.

The executive director of the Poker Players Alliance, John Pappas said, “Poker is not a crime in South Carolina or anywhere else, and we are grateful to the court for compiling the overwhelming evidence that proves this case and protects the rights of players,” he said, “ This ruling is fully consistent with the declarations of other judges and juries across the country that Texas Hold’em is clearly a game of predominant skill and adults who play should not be criminalized.”

The ruling comes as a result of an appeal to a conviction of five players who were arrested during a police raid on a poker room. Defense cited poker as a game of skill which does not fall under the umbrella of gambling. The court ruled that the evidence proving poker as a game of skill was overwhelming and found the laws to be unclear and overly broad.

South Carolina State Director of the Poker Players Alliance said, “All poker players are well aware that the game is based on making the correct, informed decisions, not just mere chance, and games of predominant skill should not be classified in the same league as slot machines or lotteries,”

“We’re very pleased that the judge considered the overwhelming evidence and came to the same conclusion. This is a well deserved legal victory for the players, the American game of poker, and for common sense under the law.”

While such a thing is good news for the online poker industry as a whole, it isn’t telling the world anything it doesn’t know already. Further, beneath the surface of this is something more disturbing. The fact that the government has gotten so big that people cheer when they are told it is legal for them to play a game illustrates this. Instead of being enraged that the government is infringing on our rights by criminalizing games, we praise them when they say it’s Ok.

It’s a kind of Stockholm Syndrome that we’ve developed in this nation. The government has had its foot on so many of our rights that we have fallen in love with our captors and praise them when they let us do what free men and women should already be able to do. And the only time they let us do it is when it benefits the government itself. Gambling is bad, unless it is taxed and the government makes money. Prostitution is bad, unless it is taxed and the government makes money. The government says who we can and can’t marry, what sex acts we can perform in the privacy of our bedroom, how much alcohol can be in our alcoholic beverages, how fast we can drive, and pretty soon it will control our health care. You name it, the government controls it. So is this a victory for online and offline poker players? Or is it a sad reminder of how far we have come from a free society, to a nanny state?

Much tomfoolery and ballyhoo has been made of the abrupt shutdown of Pit Bull Poker and the recent arrest of its owners in Costa Rica. The kids over at Gambling 911 have been keeping an eye on the scandal and reported that the situation isn’t quite as simple as it may have sounded. It seems that Pit Bull Poker’s problems don’t end with the Pit Bull Poker site itself. Other online gambling sites will often use poker skins, a kind of “poker outsourcing” to attract players. Pit Bull Poker applied this same concept to its business model and some former Pit Bull players are rattling the cages of sites like 5 Dimes Sportsbook, which used Pit Bull Poker’s flash poker skin.

The problem now is determining who is at fault. For example, I do a lot of my shopping at Whole Foods and I often eat at their hotbar. However much of the food at the hotbar is purchased from outside vendors. If I get food poisoning, is that Whole Foods’ fault or is it the vendors? Since Whole Foods is selling the vendors’ wares, there is a strong argument that they should be more aware of with whom they’re buying their food. But certainly had Whole Foods known that the food was bad, they would not have purchased it in the first place and certainly would not have passed it on to their customers.

Gambling 911 came across the following complaint on the Sports Book Review Forums which showcases the frustration that both parties are encountering.

“I have played with 5dimes for a couple of years. I played alot of poker through their flash poker room which was a skin of pitbull poker. It is came out that pitbull poker poker owners were playing there against customers and cheating them. It is has been verified on 2+2 poker forum by the pitbull poker representavivre Dave he went to shop and they were packing up servings trying to get away and the authories were called and they have been arested. Also on parttimepoker there is an article explaing what happened. I called 5dimes and explained and they said they will be not be reimburing for anything, I played in the biggest cash games there buying in for 500 at a time. There is no telling how much money I was cheated out of. 5dimes says that since they were in business with pitbull poker and they are no longer in business that they cant recover my stolen funds, thats not my problem that is theres. I should be compensated by 5dimes that is there responsiblity not to be in business with crooks I intrusted my money and there integerity there is why I played. PLEASE HELP!”

After not receiving the response he had hoped for, “fareed” engages in a tense conversation with “Tony” who is apparently the owner of 5 Dimes:

Please wait for a site operator to respond.

You are now chatting with ‘Diana’

Diana: Hello. How may I assist you today?

fareed: I need to speak with tony

Diana: Just a moment please

Please wait while I transfer the chat to ‘Tony’.

You are now chatting with ‘Tony’

Tony: how can I help you today?

fareed: Hello tony, I have called referring to flash poker room situation and was blown off, I then posted at SBR about situation and sent email with link to thread and now my account is dissabled. I played alot on flash poker room at the biggest tables, I am member of 2+2 poker where scandal of cheating has been revealed by daves Brenes employee at pitbull now there owners are arrested I am justing wanting some type of compensation seeing there is no teeling how much money I was cheated out of, I have been good customer and have referred player that loses thousands , I just want this made right sir

Tony: really, losses of thousands?

Tony: you’ve got so many notes on your account for “issues” that my new notes didn’t even fit

Tony: and you like to play your little “take care of everything I need or I’ll run and post”

fareed: I tried to call and speak with some one but was not taken serious

Tony: i don’t think there was a single thing wrong at pitbull other than they turned out to be underfunded

Tony: well, I the authority going no higher than me, and from your notes and action, I don’t see why anyone should take you seriously

Tony: *well, the authority going no higher than me, and from your notes and action, I don’t see why anyone should take you seriously

fareed: no there is many players at 2+2 poker who have come together with various instances, I just know for sure one time I was called with 10 high and for 1.2k pot and that is not possible

fareed: I understand they are a diffent company than you

Tony: Poker transfers 02/19/2008 to date:

Tony: Transfers to Flash Poker from 5d: $7,564.18

Tony: Transfers from Flash Poker to 5d: $10,227.16

Tony: Transfers to 3D Poker from 5d: $5,960

Tony: Transfers from 3D Poker to 5d: $3,242

Tony: do you want to share those figures in all your posts, or do you want me to?

fareed: I will share those as I do not have them and I tried contacting pitbull poker for hand histories not even blasming you

Tony: “5dimes has screwed me out of thousands! “

Tony: is that you?

fareed: I just know of one player I played with and he is supposedly one the superusers, yes I was mad because support basicaaly hung up one me

Tony: well, i don’t blame them

Tony: “5dimes has screwed me out of thousands! “

Tony: is that you?

fareed: I fell like I should be heard when I refeer my best friend who has deposited around 6k and never withdrew

Tony: lets try this one more time…

Tony: “5dimes has screwed me out of thousands! “

Tony: is that you?

fareed: yes that was my post as I was very upset not to be even heard the amount of money could well be in the thousands sir, I mean just a little understanding would have been nice

fareed: as you can see I also posted that my email was reponedtoo

Tony: “reponedtoo” what does that mean?

fareed: I also explained that 5dimes was a skin of pitbull poker and I played at 5dimes because of the integerity you have earned

fareed: responed too

fareed: responded to

Tony: and explain how “5dimes has screwed me out of thousands!”

fareed: I was obviously involved in hands where supersusers beat me out of money , please check link at 2+2 with over 1k posts concerning this,I dont expect 5dimes to refund all that juct a something saying hey we had no contraol of pitbull poker that we did business with, I mean i refer poeple and always say you dont have to worry about 5dimes they are straight up but pitbull poker was not straight so as 5dimes is I assumed you would make it right

Tony: [23:11:19] Tony: Transfers to Flash Poker from 5d: $7,564.18

Tony: [23:11:19] Tony: Transfers from Flash Poker to 5d: $10,227.16

Tony: what more do I have to say?

Tony: how about we’re honoring all winnings from pitbull even though we know they’re not going to settle their figure with us

Tony: how about all funds transferred to that skin are being honored

Tony: too difficult to comprehend those facts?

fareed: I won money and have had night where I lost 4figures, I know I have played against superuser and he was one who called with 10 high on river allin, no one in world calls that

Tony: “and 5Dimes screwed me out of thousands!”

fareed: if you have hand histories you can see this

Tony: i don’t have hand histories

Tony: and i don’t have any e-mail requests for hand histories

Tony: now that pitbull has closed up shop, that is the end of that opportunity

Tony: everyone on 2+2 is so damm smart, then what were they don’t on such a bad network?

Tony: i still think all this “superuser” crap is non-sense

Tony: but it killed a company

Tony: you have my stance on things, what else you need me to answer?

fareed: Well tony I still want to be a customer and would appreciate sometype of rebate on at least the one instance I know for sure, i mean all I am asking for is some type of gesture to resolve problem

Tony: i see no problem

Tony: i see only accusations

Tony: i see a customer who won on a network

Tony: now, I in no way think there were any so called “super-users” on the pitbull network

Tony: but if in any way I thought there were, do you think I would allow 5Dimes customers to continue to play there?

Tony: and this is a yes or no question, i don’t want a paragraph from you

fareed: I know at the biggest buyin that I played buying in for $500 we all discuedd at 2+2 I was cheated by superuser that DAves Brenes confirms

Tony: i asked a yes or no question

Tony: simple question

Tony: you plan on answering?

fareed: and I think you would not intenationally involve 5dimes with crooks

Tony: and i don’t involve myself with customer’s like you

Tony: we’ll keep your account closed

Tony: 5Dimes no longer needs you as a customer

fareed: wow nice customer serice

Tony: its clear from all the notes that 5Dimes is not capable of living up to your standards

Tony: consider it me doing you a favor

Tony: plenty of other A+ companies out there for you to play with

fareed: Well I deposited my money with you and if has been cheated through your flash poker romm, I will tell my story at all my forums just to warn your customers and future ones.

The most important part of this conversation might very well be this:

Tony: [23:11:19] Tony: Transfers to Flash Poker from 5d: $7,564.18

Tony: [23:11:19] Tony: Transfers from Flash Poker to 5d: $10,227.16

Tony: what more do I have to say?

Tony: how about we’re honoring all winnings from pitbull even though we know they’re not going to settle their figure with us

Tony: how about all funds transferred to that skin are being honored

Tony: too difficult to comprehend those facts?

Naturally, things like this are going to bring every Harry Hardluck and Sally Sobstory who has ever lost a dime at Pit Bull Poker out of the woodwork. People are going to complain up and down that they lost their money unfairly and they will go after anybody they think can throw them a bone. Obviously “Tony” is taking a hardline with folks he deems to be looking for a handout while 5 Dimes is doing right by many of its customers who had won money, but would otherwise not be paid out by Pit Bull. The same cannot be said for other online gambling sites. The sad thing is that in this situation, everyone has been hurt by Pit Bull’s irresponsible behavior (whether or not their business practices were criminal remains unclear at this time). However it should send a message to all online poker players and gamblers alike. That you should never deposit more money than you would feel comfortable losing.

Halloween is one of my favorite holidays, mostly because it is an excuse for the most conservative of girls to dress in the sluttiest costumes imaginable. Sure, you may be a straight-laced office manager the rest of the year, but on Halloween you’re a naughty nurse. Sluttiness aside, the other thing I love about Halloween is the candy, especially candy corn, for which I would like to thank all Native Americans for introducing to the colonists.

VIP Slots Casino seems to feel the same as me, which is why they’re getting their Halloween party started early. All month long, the online casino is holding the Halloween Party tournament, which is being played on the slot machine called Black Magic. The online slot doesn’t have any naughty nurses, but it does have skulls, witches and other creepy stuff. The tournament runs until October 31 and has a $100,000 prize pool. In the first-place player wins $50,000 and the second-place player takes home $20,000. Prizes are given out all the way down to 275^th place, where the player wins $10.

In addition to the slot tournament, VIP Slots Casino also has a good loyalty points promotion for the Monster Money slot game. The game, which has a Frankenstein theme, will give out double loyalty points for anyone who wagers on it. To me, even without the loyalty points playing a Frankenstein-themed game would be fun, but that’s because I can’t think of the big guy without thinking of Phil Hartman on Saturday Night Live saying “fire bad” over and over.

If you are in the mood to get into the Halloween spirit early, be sure to head on down to VIP Slots Casino, where dressing like a slut wearing a Halloween costume is in style all month long.

Thus far, Gambling Review has published roughly 7 million stories (or at least it seems that way) about the Unlawful Internet Gambling Enforcement Act (UIGEA) and Representative Barney Frank’s attempts to overturn it. Frank thus far has been less than successful. In 2008, Frank introduced a bill in the House that would have repealed UIGEA and was defeated, despite having a Democratic majority in the House. Once President Obama and the new Congress were sworn in back in January, Frank introduced a new bill to repeal UIGEA. The bill so far has 60 co-sponsors, though many are not confident that Frank will succeed his second time around. For various reasons, not the least of which is skyrocketing unemployment and an administration focused on passing healthcare reform, flooring of the bill has been delayed.

In the meantime, some representatives would like to stall. Though UIGEA was passed in 2006, regulations for the law weren’t passed until 2008 and the implementation of the law isn’t set until December 1, 2009. Who says Congress doesn’t get things done quickly? Now a group of representatives, led by Frank and Republican Peter King, have sent a letter to Federal Reserve Chairman Ben Bernake and Treasury Secretary Timothy Geithner asking for the implementation of UIGEA to be delayed. Their reason is that with the economy still in a deep recession, now is not a good time to place more burdens on the financial institutions.

It will be interesting to see if Bernake and Geithner listen to the request. After all, both have claimed time and again that the recession is over, despite all evidence to the contrary. Therefore, agreeing to delay the implementation of UIGEA on the basis that the recession, which they say is over, is putting too much of a burden on the financial industry would seem to be an admission that they are lying, or at least wrong, about the economy. For that reason, like the passage of Frank’s bill, I think this attempt will fail.

It’s not often that I take time out of my day to comment on fashion trends. Though I consider myself somewhat fashionable, I like to leave that commentary to the professional critics, who like to call outfits “sexy and fun,” “avant-garde,” and either “contemporary” or “throwback,” depending on if it’s something new or recycled. There is one fashion trend that really bothers me, though. Well, two (the other is the popped collar – frat boys, please stop).

It’s sunglasses. I want to make this clear to everyone: Unless you’re a blind pianist, wearing sunglasses indoors is never cool. In fact, you look like an idiot. Yes, that includes you, Bono. I’ve seen way too many people in poker tournaments lately wearing shades. Unless the tournament is outdoors – which would be pretty cool, by the way – then the above rule applies to wearing sunglasses when participating in a poker tournament.

Not only do you look like a fool, which may be your intention, but some people may think you have an unfair advantage. After all, one of the things that makes poker a skill, rather than a game of sheer chance, is that players can read the reactions of others as they play out a hand and try to determine, based on that, whether or not they have good cards. Facial expressions, for those who don’t have a good poker face, are a common tell, and hiding behind a pair of sunglasses can mask that tell. Of course, everyone wants to give themselves an edge over the competition, but I’m against anyone taking any skill out of the game, no matter how minor it may be. I’ve heard many people say that serious players don’t wear sunglasses; it’s just some yahoos playing in the tournaments. Some major tournaments have been won by fools in sunglasses, though, and the more it happens, the more it encourages people to look like an idiot.

I’m not the only one who feels this way. If you’re wearing sunglasses, there’s a good chance the other people playing with you don’t like it. At best, they think you’re a moron and aren’t too worried about you. At worst, they think you have an advantage. In any case, television producers aren’t too fond of it, either. Nowadays, there are a lot of poker tournaments put on TV. Nothing takes away from the drama of a poker tournament like covering up the part of you that shows the most expression: your eyes. In fact, the producer of a major televised poker tournament once said that if everyone at the final table was wearing glasses, he would give them an ultimatum: Either take off your glasses or we’re not having the game.

I’m not going to tell people what to do. If you would rather look like a fool and hide behind sunglasses because you’re not confident enough in your ability to play poker like the big boys, exposed face and all, then go ahead.  But like the popped collar, I will cringe every time I see it.